Cartoon Gallery
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 "I think if you subtract the figure in the 'Days I Go Home Early' column from the figure in the "Snippy Attitude" column you'll reach a zero-sum figure." |  "Isn't that our bookkeeper?" |  "This is NOT what I expected when you said you'd like me to be your bookkeeper. Read me the next entry from the ledger." |  "My car runs part of the time on an alternative energy source. In fact, here it is now." |
 Relying Too Much On AlgebraTo Get The Right Answer - "Yes, I can see that's a quadratic polynomial, but no, I still don't want to marry you." |  "You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time. But it takes a staggering advertising budget to fool all of the people all of the time." |  The New Hollywood - "CUT! PASTE!" |  "It's another deep probe from Earth seeking contact with extraterrestrials. I wish they'd just include an e-mail address." |