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 "You want to know why I'm mad? I suggest you download my latest novel called, 'Why an Obsessive Control-Freak Husband Should Never Pick Out Bathroom Tile Without Asking His Wife First.'" |  (HANK ORDERS IDEAS FOR HIS MYSTERY/HORROR NOVEL) "Well Shoot! This isn't a case of the willies, this is a case of the heebee jeebee's!" |  "He saw your laptop and wants to know if he can check his email." |  "We're much better prepared for this upgrade than before. We're giving users additional training, better manuals, and a morphine drip." |
 "The kids are getting up right now. When we wired the house we added vibrating pager technology to their bunk beds." |  "We take network security very seriously here." |  "...so if you have a message for someone, you write it on a piec of paper and put it on their refrigerator. It's just until we get our email fixed." |  (The Secret Room at Every Internet Service Provider) "I'll be right there. Let me just take care of this user. He's about halfway through a 3 hour download." |