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 "Seriously - why always a black bat cave? Why not a mauve bat cave? Or an egg shell bat cave? We could do a wallpaper wainscoting in contrasting stripes |  "You did an excellent job, Dave. But two months seems a long time to paint the bathroom." |  "We got a hybrid loan. It starts out as a fixed rate loan, converts into an ARM, and if the lender's not satisfied with his return, we host his in-laws every other summer in the basement." |  "The paperwork for your mortgage seems to be in order. Now, if we can tap a vein for your signature we'll be all set." |
 "When we bought it 5 years ago the mortgage payments seemed huge. But we got used to it. Please, pull up an orange crate and make yourself comfortable." |  "Before you begin your home staging consultation, let me say one thing, because I know what you're thinking, and we already plan on getting rid of that hideous lamp." |  "OK, OK! You drive hard bargain. Me throw in washing machine." |  "Well, it always helps to put fresh flowers around, and simmer some potpourri on the stove. Oh, and let's get rid of those Alligator Motels." |