Cartoon Gallery
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 "The one thing I've learned about investing is, timing is every |  "It's surprising considering his portfolio is so conservative." |  (Defining your investment risk with the Toast retrieving Risk tolerance test.) |  "Of course I could never afford a shoe this size if I weren't collecting rents from a tennis shoe across town and two espadrilles in Florida." |
 (Good money after bad.) "I opened with a big sale on 'closed' signs and no one came in. I decided to add some 'keep out' signs but still no one came in. But now I'm going to invest in some 'Bio Hazard' signs -throw them in the window and see what happens." |  "I know you're passionate about your fundraising, but I wish you wouldn't refer to my family as your donor-in-laws." |  (Friends Of The Park Membership Drive) "At what level membership can we put you down for - 'Foliage,' 'Lawn,' or 'Fertilizer?'" |  (Volunteer Corp.) "I'm gonna need help changing this tire. Do I have any volunteers?" |