Cartoon Gallery
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 "Of course I could never afford a shoe this size if I weren't collecting rents from a tennis shoe across town and two espadrilles in Florida." |  (Good money after bad.) "I opened with a big sale on 'closed' signs and no one came in. I decided to add some 'keep out' signs but still no one came in. But now I'm going to invest in some 'Bio Hazard' signs -throw them in the window and see what happens." |  "Sell." |  "I told Julian to take our money to Rappenship's and put it in to a good company. You want to mail your life savings to Procter and Gamble?" |
 "Oh Martin, you scared me half to death! Next time let me know when you're picking a new stock." |  "We want to thank you for this generous donation, however, the board is reluctant to grant your request that the new research center be in your name. I'm sure you can understand, Mr. Hairbrane." |  "That's very innovative of the Girl Scouts, but I'm just not interested in buying a box of Girl Scout cigars." |  "Robin, some of the men thought our mission statement, 'Steal from the rich. Give to the poor.', didn't quite cover it, and would like to include 'Forest Conservation, Wilderness Survival, the Advancement of Recreational Archery, Ambushing Techniques, Bird Watching...'" |