Home Cartoons

"Before you begin your home staging consultation, let me say one thing, because I know what you're thinking, and we already plan on getting rid of that hideous lamp."

"You did an excellent job, Dave. But two months seems a long time to paint the bathroom."

"Well, it always helps to put fresh flowers around, and simmer some potpourri on the stove. Oh, and let's get rid of those Alligator Motels."

"I just thought it was time to sell. The laces kept coming untied, there's a leak in the heel, and it needs all new odor-eaters."

"We got a hybrid loan. It starts out as a fixed rate loan, converts into an ARM, and if the lender's not satisfied with his return, we host his in-laws every other summer in the basement."

"My suggestion would be to cover it with a bush and hope no one notices."

"When we bought it 5 years ago the mortgage payments seemed huge. But we got used to it. Please, pull up an orange crate and make yourself comfortable."

"Seriously - why always a black bat cave? Why not a mauve bat cave? Or an egg shell bat cave? We could do a wallpaper wainscoting in contrasting stripes

"OK, OK! You drive hard bargain. Me throw in washing machine."

"I'm not sure this entirely justifies the 'water view' increase in your selling price."