Finance Cartoons

"I'm not sure - I like the mutual funds with rotating dollar signs, although the dancing stocks and bonds look good too."

"I read about investing in a company called UniHandle Ohio, but I'm uneasy about a stock that's listed on the NASDAQ as UhOh."

"Tell the Community Recycling Initiative that I've received their fundraising letter."

"I asked my investment advisor for something that was low cost, easy to manage, and also functions on its own. He suggested an index fund or a robo vac."

(Friends Of The Park Membership Drive) "At what level membership can we put you down for - 'Foliage,' 'Lawn,' or 'Fertilizer?'"

"Annuities? Equity Income? Tax-free Municipals? I say we stick the money in the ground like always, and then feed this guy to the sharks."

"We want to thank you for this generous donation, however, the board is reluctant to grant your request that the new research center be in your name. I'm sure you can understand, Mr. Hairbrane."

(4 food franchises to avoid investing in. International House of Broccoli, Squid-on-a-Stick, Liverland, McOffals.)

"Robin, some of the men thought our mission statement, 'Steal from the rich. Give to the poor.', didn't quite cover it, and would like to include 'Forest Conservation, Wilderness Survival, the Advancement of Recreational Archery, Ambushing Techniques, Bird Watching...'"

"Do I recommend a hedge fund strategy? Let me put it to you this way: I'm a strict Catholic who goes to Temple every Saturday, so 'yes,' I would recommend a hedge fund strategy."