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 "This program's really helped me learn a new language. It's so buggy I'm constantly talking with overseas service reps." |  "Other than this little glitch with the landscape view , I really love my iPhone." |  "No that's not the icon for Excel, it's the icon for Excuse, the database of reasons why you haven't learned the other programs in Office." |  "I started running 'what if' scenarios on my spreadsheet, like, 'What if I were sick of this dirtwad job and funneled some of the company's money in to an off-shore account?'" |
 (At FEMA, employees often use Excel's custom format function to create formulas for disaster.) |  (So, old Dave's presentations are boring? They're dull, huh? "Add some dynamic content," they said. I'll give you dynamic content...) |  "Okay- looks like the 'Dissolve' transition in my presentation needs adjusting." |  Why are my Speaker's Notes so large? |